just remembered I set the house on fire the othe day
***
just realised I dreamt the other night/day (who knows) that I set the house on fire
also just realised I'm probably gonna look like Pete Rock pretty damn soon
when is the man suppossed to sleep with so many records to listen to? no wonder he's got back problems. I at least try to sleep he looks like he doesn't. I'm not normally such a big fan of this cult, collecting anything so obsessively is often an ego thing and I have no respect for big egos but (our Peter is a fucking genius and no respect is not an option plus) when I look at the massive bags under this guy's eyes and hear him talking about them records I double-believe he actually loves and listens to all of them RESPECT. still pissed about the no show at jazz cafe last year though. ok not really, get some sleep Pete all the wax will still be there when you wake up.
also also just realised ... but forgot what it was. will come back and edit if remember. will come back and edit anyway dontchano. it's how this works
ah yes... this month has been so screwed up I keep getting lost as to what day it is both in so-called reality and in my rather skewed diary. not only did last weekend fall on wednesday thursday friday (same as the week before actually. not unusual I prefer having weekends on weekdays and avoid real weekends they no good) but then monday which was saturday didn't happen -which would have been alright mondays tend not to happen, it doesn't make sense to have sunday as the day before the first weekday rather than proper part of the weekend so then you need monday to relax, sleep and chill in the park/square it all makes sense trust me - but then tuesday didn't happen either and then I suddenly fell really ill (like someone hit me with a spade and injected with quick action fever like one minute I was chilling in the square the next trembling and crawling up to bed, not even capable of getting meds) and lost wednesday and thursday too I think and that thursday I lost was I think yesterday which was monday
anyways anyways 'real' life monday completely escaped me whichever day of that so far completely nonexistent week it was hence your weekly suggestion falls on tuesday which is technically wednesday as it is 4 am ... here it comes:
2. don't dismiss people easily, you don't know what they know what they don't and what they want. and what they may teach you and where and who you may find a real friend
May has been so fucked up I don't think I've properly taken it on board yet, I'm in the proces of expanding the board but the speed things are changing it feels I'm not fast enough it brought so many surprises my head is still spinning and it hasn't stopped spinning form what happened in april yet. double triple take kinda shit just keeps dropping no pouring all over the place like tropical rain. and I do love tropical rain may it last
couldn't believe my own eyes when I saw the flyer. was telling a friend last time at the boiler room they should get dego et al in (though she didn't seem to know who I was talking about)
and king brit??!! o my motherfucking days! 30 seconds later I'd already sent a text trying to beg myself in. didn't even think to check if it was in london. didn't expect to get in either just had to try. but get in I did and am pretty sure it was my best BR experience so far (they all good I promise). the fact that it was the first one I've been to where I could move made it even better! it wasn't less tropical though so the water was pouring down me in hectoliters as usual they did get they name right for sho - I don't actually recommend hardcore gymnastics in tropical temperatures but trying to stop myself would have been pointless. all the four sets were good good. dego killed it for me as usual, I love the man, every set I've witnessed of his ( not to mention his live perfomances - can be a bit of a stalker me, when it comes to my favourie people dontchano) was gooder than good. king britt - amazing! didn't know what to expect, I'd listened to some quite diverse sets of his - he is the cameleon of the music world, and a bit of a king midas too! charlie dark I like most as a poet and got some Charlie Dark poetry. the CDR's Tony Nwachkwu was a discovery - for some reason I've been avoiding the CDR (probably because of the inevitable associacion...), I shall avoid it no more! if I find time.. what a sick line-up! I even listened to Charlie Bones' warm-up - at home while cutting out letters for my new NOTrelevant design coming soon to shops near you - and liked that too, unexpectedly.
if you weren't as lucky and/or determined as me you still get a chance to see king britt this Friday here. do, he might just blow your head off. you may well see me too, I'm planning on hiding in the bathroom after Dabrye tomorrow night yeeey
as per usual at a wicked gig with sick line-up remembered the camera at pretty much the last minute.
and pulled it out mainly coz I wanted a picture of dego djing with his little back pack on. #supercute
if you are not yet a dedicated fan start watching boiler room TVnow! and get a t-shirt while you can!
also, while we at it here's a wicked wicked track by D'Vo, the factory and the amazing psylus
look out for these people. as I mentioned earlier they are bound for greatness
I've not been so excited since 1949 which means I really need to sart working on working out some likely reason why it could go terribly wrong and becoming pessimistic about it ... if I find time...
if it does go terribly wrong it will have to be for resons other that the gig being avarage - dabrye doesn't do avarage I don't think, though he has only been djing (as dabrye spinning hip hop that is) since last year apparently and it was only last year that he came back after disappearing for a long while (his label Ghostly International launched the FREE DABRE movemen to get him work on Three/Three. looks like they have like eh! fingers crossed) .
I remember very well the moment when after watching can't remember what on youtube I clicked on one of the sugestions on the right, someone I'd never heard of, no video, this picture
spent the rest of the day listening to dabrye's marvelous creations and decided he was one of my favourite beatmakers EVER. then there was kutmah's all dabrye mix on NTS - he's just put it out for a free download here.
if you are in london or within reasonable distance you may want to check in here on thursday 24 may for the man's FIRST EVER UK SHOW
oh. OH. OH.O H !
if I hear Count Bass D on thursday which is more than likely isn't it? omg omg omg omg omg omg omg I shall die a happy person. and probably make a scene in the club. don't worry I have no intention of actually dying. not until I've seen CBD
a couple of weeks ago someone I know and can't quite call a friend (a long mildly unpleasant story) though a certin website would insist otherwise, said he was open for suggestions. so I went on and gave him one (we were 'not quite yet friends' then, but not yet 'not friends any more' either though it was already in the air, we didn't hang in the 'friends' area for no time. he ignored my suggestion). and while I was typing it up this idea came to me. see I realised I have a lot of suggestion up my sleve. what better way of sharing them than a weekly suggestion service! I thought Monday would be a good day to receive a weekly suggestion and since I just remembered just now and it is a Monday....the weekly suggestion service at your service!
1. use common sense as a last resort, when you've run out of your own
you know that braindead glee on Bernard Black's face when he finds out he can have a ham sandwich? with a pickle? here it is well I've been catching myself with that on a lot recently ....
slept for about 20 hours in the last...35 at more or less random times. kinda cool given that I don't sleep much and not for want of trying. is my brain really dying (feels like it at times, maybe it's just a fuse) or has my body decided to catch up on the last.... good few year of' sleep and if so is this gonna go on? or is it some sort of subconscious depression and in that case is it gonna go on? any charity therapists out there? sorry as I might have mentioned im so broke I can't even pay u no mind, which admittedly would make therapy pointless if it wasn't anyway
think I may have to leave this place at least for a while before I go full Bernard B....:/ and more imporantly end up living out in the out in the street and asking money for food (I don't own a shop unfortunately. yet) ....mind you if that should happen then this probably is so called good timing. ah but there's no such thing as good timing here is there, another reason why I have to go. OK, I need a place where there is NO LIVE MUSIC (other than Portugal) and it's HOT any suggestions (including free accommodation preferably)?
on second thought Portugal is perfect
on second second thought I was just invited to Tanzania
I'm not going anywhere am I? I need to get down to fucking work whatever that means I haven't got a clue.
went to see robert glasper experiment tonight at Barbican with high expecations I guess but too much has been happening, a lot of it exhausting, some of it very very good, a lot of it bad so I didn't really have mindspace to think about it and be excited. I did have hight expectations though and I was right. it was a totally amazing experience, some bits of it otherworldly. sure there were slower less rousing moments. of course. can't fly all the time and actually I did fly a lot for one sit down show. hope I didn't break the chair I was jumping on. I usually find still audiences hard but this time I didn't pay any attention to anything just me and the music. don't know how people do it though. I guess they go to a fraction of live gigs I go to and are not used to dancing like maniacs.
one of the girls - there were about 12 of us there it turned out, almost all usual gig people came out for this one all together - hated it apparently, was disappointed because she expected...album versions? how can you prefer versions tamed for a recording to the monsters these amazing people created of some of those tracks on stage tonight. of course a song at a good gig is often only a pretext to going wild in any direction it will take the musicians! It is funny coming from someone who apparently studied music and is apparently a singer. she really likes kittens though, keeps posting pictures of kittens on fb. something must be wrong with someone who likes kittens quite so much. I understand people who love their own cats ok? understand, but am ok with them. random kittens off of internet though? not right. anyways anyways I have recorded about half of it I guess maybe two thirds didn't quite see where the recording stopped. they went on for 3 hours! and videod some too, not much and not the stuff I would have wanted some of it, it's hard for me to force myself to take the camcorder out, and even when I do I fail to concentrate on it enough so end up recorging some corners of stage or the musician's legs. I am hoping for a couple of good ones to post, not seen or listened to any of it, was about to and was also going to write some more about the concert and the experiment (maybe) but got a text message saying 'tomorrow at noon'. If I do see Bankole tomorrow at noon or after I will be very surprised (it's not easy to make it to his busy schedule) but very very happy so time to bed. can't see sleeping happening after last night (8am-2pm) but I'll give it ago, It seems I'm as likely to fall asleep now as at any given time before 6 am after any sort of day: not very likely.
I figured out how the juju can fuck up glasper and bilal for me!!! I get this totally sick day/night the day before and end up at the sit down gig at barbican - you with me? - at the end of like 45 hour long day. now. now that I figured it out is it gonna use it? no. also I found half a spliff in the bathroom.
oh and my heart went mushy I know you don't believe me but t-boz of the TLC tried to talk to me. I'm serious t-boz tried to talk to me. it may have been a big mistake and if it was my heart will brake
oh and I was offered the position of residential dancer (I had already been offered one last week) at my currently favourite jam. ok I wasn't gonna show you coz I don't even know the names of the people yet but that would be not sharing which is wrong
oh and I saw Marco earlier, just after having suddenly and to my total surprise made a huge progress on the skates. remembered again after quite a long break that sky was the limit and lost a thumb in the process (temporarily), which had me dicover I had a perfectly workingrear brake - a completely new experience I don't I think I ever had one. I didn't (use to!) bother to keep one attached. looks like I might be working on that left grip for the next couple of days till my right thumb grows back. perfect. Did I mention how I loved my bike? If I never it's coz I keep looking for the right words. I'm in the process of writing an ode to my friend Sikor the mechanic who built it, whom you absolutely have to get to check your bike, fix your bike (in either sense), build you a wheel, build you a custom bike, build your girlfriend/boyfriend/daugter/son/friend/hamster a bike. whatever you may ever need someone to do for you, your girlfriend/etc etc to do with bikes I suggest you get in touch with this guy anyways anyways
saw Marco and didn't even blink, behaved like we were still good friends, like his knife wasn't sticking out of my back at all. maybe we will be who knows.
so yeah that's me. over to juju i'm really getting into this game
I will post something that is not hysterical gibberish or/and juju bullshit at some point I promise, recently i been churning out stuff like barely never ever but I can't even keep up with what I AM writing at any given moment let alone what I HAVE alredy written (have I?)
I have reached the next level in the juju game, managed to totally suprise it by acting mega spontaneously and being totally surprised myself at the developments of this broke thursday
back from a very successful totally unexpected business meeting (picia palenia i snow o zwyciestwie - I need to watch gone with the wind to translate this one) with jordi --
[via local adventures involving an opening of a new massive twat bar on my doorstep so badly designed (a naked baby doll in a frame kind of bad. and other weird things, couldn't even determine what they were. and really old toilets that got blocked - all of them - within the first few hours of openineg with rusty old tanks not attached properly to the wall so when you pull on the rusty old chain it comes off the wall right at you, I'm surprised no one got seriously injured - cool, geddit? not. all in all a crap carboot sale pretending to be an antiques market kind of eclectic, but also cutting cost so bad everything literally falling apart. and I am talking the opening night here!!) and by the looks of things so loved by the new white british clapton crowd it hurts. met the builders - including an interesting russian sculptor-designer - who had to build it the way they were told=fuck up everything that could possibly be fucked up while knowing how it should be done. clapton has been turning from crackton into crapton fast. it's painful. I can live with dalston cause I dont live there but this I'm gonna have to do something about quick...]
-- with great pictures from a recent gig and (50) dillas (2004) beats! fucking madness! another broke thursday (May so far actually) turns into best day ever kinda shit. oh well. should be used to this...me and the juju (this by the way is, I hope you realise, interchangeable with god, fate, lady luck, fuku, you name it) can be a really good team when we both put some effort in it.
and my biggest goldfish/geanie dream is still to bring CBD to london. and since I've got 3: Hermanos de Causa and Damu the Fudgemunk. I know I could have picked easier (or at least possible) but when did I ever?
that's fine but I'm so broke I can't even pay you no mind
they have THE REAL AVOCADO (and mango) in harlsden! hundreds! in HARLSDEN!! you know the big, bright yellow inside thing that gets ripe and creamy before it rots and has taste! as opposed to the ubiquitous greyish green tasteless stuff that never really ripens. I thought they might actually, I hadn't been to Ivan's 'willesden junction' shop in years, not since I moved out of the one andonly All Souls Avenue I guess, and Palm 2 has now replaced it as The Best Shop in London (not only amazing when it comes to selection quality and resourcefulness, they are also the nicest people!) but I suspected if it was to be found anywhere it'd have to be there. and it is.
went on a bit of a sentimental trip around that area the other day as it turned out the exam i was doing (examining not being examined which is another story) was at the academy right behind All Souls.
Kensal Green/Rise has changed. New developmens, new posh pubs and bars and trendy shops along Harrow Road and Chamberlain road (wireless not working at the Paradise though, disappointing). I was relieved to see that the little Bangladeshi newsagents is still there. went to say hello and the owner remembered me and was really happy to see me! I had lived in his flat above the shop for about two weeks when I decided a month on the living room sofa at 168 (while waiting to take over the small room or was it a cupboard?) was enough, shared my problem with the guy and two days later he said he had a room for me. it was the most uncomfortable sofa trust me. cafe rossio still there too, still empty other than a couple of sombre portuguese pensioners each at their separate table, sipping cafezinho, but the É uma casa portuguesa, com certeza seems to have disappeared off the wall...
Harlsden... is Harlsden, as dodgy now as it was then. completely forgot about the killer one way system combined with too narrow and crammed pavements to go over them. had to walk with the bike and yes, did end up having long conversations and giving away all fags to the local area boys life is life. other than that no interaction, which didn't surprise me much. I got used out of west london and how unfriendly and tense it is compared to the east. got back emotionally knackered and instead of going home where did I go? yep. and there of all places I got the first hint of the amazing month of April being OVER. only just realised actually it was May 1 the day when things started going wrong. or rather were about to start but it was already in the air. I can feel these things somehow, not sure why. something to do with my date of birth I'm told.
so
strikes back.
I've been waiting I let myself be so unapologetically positive about everything that's been happening I could barely believe it let me. I've been talking about it too, in an unashamedly happy way, telling poeple how amazing all the developments have been and how blessed I've been feeling. I knew I was daring fate, I knew it was watching me with it's ever more squinting eyes. still, zero negativity, zero spells, zero superpower shit. I had become quite good at it's game but recently I just wouldn't play. and for the entire month of April it let me. and bwoy if it wasn't the best month ever!
as I said I've been waiting and it came down crashing on me, hitting where it hurts. but hey as I said also, I know it's game, I'll take it through the nose as they say where I'm from. now. fuck off juju yes yes boiler room!
I've goten a bit lost thinking about too many things at the same time, (ok that's not exactly new hahahaha) and the fact that ALL of my projects suddenly seem possible - more than possible, about to happen! - doesn't help. it cannot all happen at the same time. decisions need to be made as to what first. it's still everything in the long run, I hope I'll never be forced to abandon any of the ideas that seem so ripe and ready to have actual work put into them. but there are too many and I keep coming up with new ones and it all fits together beautifully which doesn't unfortunately mean that there is enough time for all of it. also I still spend the lion part of the day thinking up things and a measly flea part actually making them happen. It has been changing slowly but surely but slowly... the studio siuation is still on hold, we can't start working there until C moves all her STUFF (all three vanloads of it apparently) there and we have built the mezzanine so that's one excuse. having suddenly been hired and having to spend time being paid for hanging out is another.
and then there is the hypermania. a perfect state. I recommend to anyone who can handle it, keep it at just the right level so it doesn't kill or turn into depression when you (inevitably) need rest. but it also consumes time and energy. again used wisely it brings a lot of good important experience (and contacts) which I am really greatful for but again again, it's just experience.
meanwhile - ¿as yet another method of procrastination? - I insist on helping people, some of whom don't even want my help and don't seem to appreciate it much. it's ok, I don't expect anything in return and when I do get a thank you, comes as a nice surprise, I know no one's forcing me to be mother f theresa it's my choice (well not exactly, it was mama nature's decision I guess, I dey thank u mama o!). sometimes though I wonder if it's worth it and if it's the best I can do, maybe I should start helping myself a bit more, the rent unfortunately will not pay itself. bitch. I have managed to opt out of money as much as possible I think but completely not gonna happen not in this world.
had a nightmare last night. I don't really get those, I've only had a handful during my entire life. I do have weird dreams with some pretty kray shit going on I guess, sometimes when I tell people they say the stuff would scare the shit out of them but I don't really find them scary (may be something to do with the fact that I'm not generally prone to fear, I don't really come across scary things, places or people in life) I remember my first nightmare, I was three years old and Filip the grasshopper from Maya the Bee turned into stone and then into fire. I was frightened. Then many years later I had one in which me and my mother were running through a maze of canals, pipes and tubs chased by someone trying to bury us alive. I had a couple more over the years when a family memebr died and last night's one was one of them. the worst thing I can imagine happening happened out of the blue in the middle of one of those intense fucked up stories I tend to dream: someone knocks on my door and says my brother is dead. fell off a cliff or something I didn't actually listen to the details my legs gave in I fell to the floor and started thrushing about and wailing. this went on for a while until I woke up completely distraught.
